Granted, but because they are in the refridgerator and not the freezer, they melt.

I wish for world domination, of the nice, friendly variety.

Granted. you don't know, but history isn't what you learned at school. there's something no one know,and only few do.
SOVIETS ARE RISING AGAIN.
after russia conquered some neighbors, they finally raise a red flag and begin to conquer all the wolrd.
but when the soviets are coming to defeat america(the continent), a Alien invasion comes and dominates all the world!
Now all the world is happy, united and loved! World is really beautiful, flowers rising at all places, The sun shining beautifully at the noon!!!
oh, forgot to say that humans are destroyed and only aliens exist here now.

I wish that i could fly.

Granted, but you got drunk and flew straight into US Military air space, so you get shot down by 20 Gatling AA guns.

I wish that the person who is next wishes for donuts.

Granted the donuts are delicious and he doesnt share them with you!

I wish for donuts

Granted the donuts are delicious and I keep them for myself!

I wish the next post would involve...

Granted, a new gun shooting little pieces of Burger King hamburgers is in development, the logo will be Whoppers Woop Ass, unfortunately it can't shoot and you can't eat the burgers because they're rock solid

I wish for a whole FREEZER filled with all the Ben & Jerry's (Filled) ice cream buckets who don't leak and are still good to eat.

granted..then a group of rabid monkeys come and steals your freezer

i wish i had some orange soda thats good to drink

Granted, but later it gives a terrible case of the gas.

I wish for... I don't Know, Random Wish please!

Granted.you wished you could throw your D49 away.
and you threw it away. so no more D49 to you.
YOU LOST YOUR D49!
MUAHAHAHA
now you must use a A42 Skrith Pistol, while I melt the D49 to later sell it for some dollars.
MUAHAHAHAHA
I wish I wasn't so evil.
Edit:
MUAHAHAHAHHA*Lightining in the background*

Granted, but I become so angry with you, that I modify a D49 so that it's has a black frame with a white rose engraved in the handle, then I come to your house, then I proceed to destroy all your now "good" plans and I shoot you in the head. After I get your money from melting my Previous D49, I torch your house in a inferno, and laugh at your burning corpse, that's what happens if you take my D49.

Let this be a lesson to everyone who steals my D49 unless they ask.

I wish for Breaking Benjamin to come to my house.

Granted, but they run away soon from the smell and swear revenge upon you...

I wish for the ivory tower to fall over..

Granted ... on your head.

I wish for me to wish this.

Granted, you say I wish, and now you can't finish your sentence, te genie concludes you wish for nothing

I wish to be the best krav maga fighter in the whole world

Granted, but you will be in danger due to jealous, inferior krav maga fighters.

I wish for a donut.

Granted, but a fat guy behind you stole it from you

I wish new battery for my phone

granted, the new battery is empty within 3 seconds, and explodes when you try to remove it

I wish I knew what to wish for

Granted, but that wish had already been made, thus causing the time continuum to fold back on itself and you live the most demoralizing moment of your life for all eternity.

I wish to know what to not wish for.

Granted, you don't wish for life, so you get death.

I wish to carve my own path, and no one follows nor leads me.

Granted, you walk all day and years and you never find end

I wish there is no school

Granted. 'Nuff said.

I wish I didn't have such a bad headache right now.

Granted. however, you think that you are cured from the headache, but then you know that actually it is some obscure alien technology brainwashing your brain. now your objectives in Earth is to detonate 9 nuclear bombs to cause a nuclear winter, and leave the atmosphere breathable to the aliens, that after make you a slave.
I wish i could use a HAMR, hack a computer, eat a sandwish, be the ruler of Earth, gain 10 000 000 dollars(american dollars) , and all this in only 3 seconds.

granted you get caught hacking the computer, the sandwich has food poisoning you get counter fit money you are overthrown from ruler by me "muahahaha" and the hammer explodes thus injuring you thus allowing the police to catch you an throw you in a federal prison and sentence you to death for hacking into the pentagon.

i wish i would be more evil more often

Granted, but now Christian demonslayers kill you for being too close to the level of the devil

I wish for UT3

Granted, you're very disappointed

I wish for nice things.

granted, then they turn to bad and evil things and kill you in your sleep

i wish for a herring that could life out of water.

granted, but it's now allergic to water..

I wish for guns, lots of guns...

Granted, you get 904.6 D49 revolvers purchased from SX for a not inconsiderable sum of money. However, when you remove them from their (strangly cold) crates, you realise they are made from solid mercury. The result: the guns melt when picked up and you go mad from mercury poisoning.

I wish for a 1000 gallon tank of lavender oil. So I can drown enemies in a peaceful and sensual environment.

Granted, but while testing it, you drown yourself.

I wish for more guns and more bullets.

granted, but the guns are all the same, and they're ugly, plus the bullets are just empty shells

I wish that my girlfriend could finally sleep over here with me (and I'm talking about sleeping and doin the thang)

Granted, but you get a STD...

I wish for a XMB-500 Personal minigun.