granted, but the rockets all misfired and destroyed you in a very nasty manner.

i wish for a chainsword. (nothing involving me getting decapatated by my own chainsword. or by other chainswords.)

Granted, but when using it on a Chaos Marine, the teeth catch on his armour, and due to the poor design of a chain sword, you have no choice but watch as it flies out of your hands. The Chaos Marine soon afterwards smashes your puny face in with his war hammer.

I wish for the last number of pi.

Granted, it is the number Ã¥Â

Granted, but you shall never live to see it fulfilled...

I wish for blue.

granted, but while seeing blue, you drown...

I wish for some guy kicking his... crotch (hoo-ha!)

Granted. Although "His" is "You".

I wish for a chain axe. And that I won't die as a result of it's use, disuse, e.t.c. And have nothing painful happen!

Granted, it explodes when you were showing it off to your girlfriend, dad, mom, brother, sister or whoever you might considered a loved one and they are killed by it

I wish for a AKM for Ballistic weapons

Granted, but by the time its finished it has to be ported onto UT6 which requires graphics cards that cost over 1000000 pounds

i wish i didn't walk into a tree that faithful thursday.

Granted. but you walk into a stop sign.
(it said STOP didint it?)

i wish for a space marine Land Raider Heavy Assault APC.

Granted, but when it arrives, you realise that it is only the model and not the real thing. On top of that, its missing a bit.

I wish for a nondescript briefcase with £500,000 in nice crisp fivers.

Granted, but it gets destoryed in a fire with all the money inside

I wish i could fly like a bird

Granted, but your too heavy, causing you to fall.

I wish for the meaning of life.

Granted, the DVD will be reaching you shortly, however, your DVD player only plays - discs and it is a + disc.

I wish for the holy hand grenade.

Granted, but you count to 5 and blow up.

I wish for a killer bunny

Granted, but it was busy laying into me when I counted to 5 and was killed in the resulting explosion.

I wish .700 Nitro Express gun

Granted, you fire that thing and the recoil dislocates your shoulder, and cracks your skull

I wish Epic would release their Unreal Engine 4 this year

Granted, but due to extremely little development time the engine will be of quality far less than Unreal Engine 3.

I wish for something.

Granted, you wish for death and I give it to you via Katana.

I wish for this thread to be the most popular thread.

Granted, it tried oh so hard but failed due to the fact that it didn't have enough views.

I wish I was in California.

Granted, but you are now sitting stuck in the never ending traffic of LA.

I wish for world war 3 and a bag of popcorn.

Granted, but the popcorn has radiation in it, and a mortar from WW3 blew you into bits.

I wish for lower food prices (Damn pop is $1.70 here)

Granted, it is lowered by 1 cent

I wish gas prices would go down a buck or two

Granted, everyone heads to the pumps immidiatly and all of the petrol is gone before you get there. In the aftermath, the price shoots up to its highest ever.

I wish that walkers will decide to start making chees and chive crisps again.

Granted and they are poisonous. The poison turns everyone into zombies

I wish for a high paying white collar job

Granted but you're a lawyer and get strangled by your tie by an angry victim.

I wish i was dead.

I said nothing painful. Since death is painful, and it happened to my loved ones, then you broke mah rules of the wish.

Granted. You are dead, but are promptly chopped up and used to make an Undead Abomination, and revived.

I wish people read my wishes more carefully...

Err, death isn't always painful you know.

Granted. The chance of someone reading your wish correctly has increased by 1%.

I wish for a DVD set containing all Cartoon Network classics.

Granted, but the DVD self destructs after 21:00.

I wish for some tactical advice for my warhammer 40k game tomorrow.

Granted. But it is HORRIBLE advice, and your get TOTALLY SERVED. Worse than Voltron on that Robot Chicken episode I referenced- You become a freakin' hermit!

I wish that the chance f people reading my wishes properly increased SIGNIFICANTLY.

Granted, the chance of them reading the posts properly increases to 99.9%. The chance of them then following said post drops to 0.1%.

I wish for a set of proper leather cricket balls